I want to be a pharmacist.
with all of my heart, I know I want to be a pharmacist.
And being in the pre-pharmacy phase of working TOWARDS being a pharmacy student is one of the most draining things ever. It's so hard when all of my friends are working towards their actual degree and profession with every class they take, and they have a target date for graduation..
Meanwhile, I work and work and work... and don't know if it's even going to be good enough to get into the program for the career I want. I'm tired of constantly feeling like I'm not good enough. The classes I'm in are designed to weed people out, and it's so hard to stay positive and keep trucking through lately. I know I'm not a dumb person, I graduated in the top 10 of my class in high school.. but the past year and a half has been so trying on me. My GPA is worse than I need for it to be, and I know I worked hard in my classes.. but it feels like it doesn't even show. I know Organic Chemistry like the back of my hand, I know the ins and outs of it... and all the Pharmacy Schools will see is a letter grade. I hate that.
I just want to make A's again. I'm tired of C's.. and failing tests after studying for nights on end. I'm tired of the uncertainty of WHEN I'll be accepted to Pharmacy school.. or IF anyone will even want me.
And I know I shouldn't think this way, but at a point you just break down. I'm emotionally exhausted, and just spent.
I love the Pharmacy profession without a doubt, and I refuse to give up until I am accepted to Pharmacy school. I'm just ready to go NOW, I'm tired of waiting. I want to be working towards my dream profession, instead of being in limbo about when I'll be able to do it.
Working in a Pharmacy has given me so much motivation, and taught me SO much more about the profession. I'm so grateful to have been given the chance to work there, and going to work doesn't even feel like a job because I love seeing our patients every day. I love that we have such a direct impact on people's lives on a daily basis. I love that we can help people understand the importance of their health. I love that we can help someone feel better, and ease the pain for them just a little so that they can enjoy every day THAT much better. I love how rewarding it feels when a patient comes in and tells us how much they appreciate and love us for everything we do to help them through their healthcare crises. I just feel like I'm in my element when I'm in the Pharmacy, and I'm ready to be more than the Over-The-Counter/Phone-Answering Specialist. ;)
A few weeks ago I found out that I've been granted an interview with UGA's College of Pharmacy for their PharmD program. I'm beyond grateful, and so incredibly excited that I've been given the opportunity to interview. Something I didn't even expect to be granted when I applied this year, but it's hard to fully enjoy it all because I don't want to get my hopes up. Based on the stats of last year's accepted applicants I know I'm in the lower end of the range, and I know I have room for improvement in my PCAT scores.. and my GPA. So keep me in your prayers over the next month, it's going to be a rollercoaster of emotions while I try to prepare for the interview... but also prepare myself for if I'm not accepted.
And in the meantime I've been trying to focus on encouraging bible verses to ease my worrisome self.